what baggage?
◼︎We can second guess each other, challenge each other, judge and condemn each other and the fact is, we DO have a choice in how we choose to live our lives here on planet earth, each of us do. It can be as simple as fulfilling our personal dreams, goals and desires, raising a family or recognizing the needs of others and aiding in bettering their lives. We’re choosing things every day, what we’ll wear, eat, who we talk to or don’t talk to. It seems that when it comes to choosing things we have a tendency to choose the things we know, what we can see and touch, have control over, worldly things that will bring immediate satisfaction or impress others. In my case, there is no question that God exists. I’m not here trying to justify God’s existence to you. He does... period! I wanted to be right with Him and I want you to understand that you can be right with Him too. But that’s your choosing, I just want to make sure that you know and understand that you do have the ability to have a relationship with GOD, and yes somethings need to change in your life.... doesn’t sound possible but it is and He's the one that can do it, and wants to!
Every time I’ve needed help He was there… always! Even when I didn’t know I needed it… there’s a song out there with the words “love that never gives up”. As I keep writing, I see God’s incredible influence that kept me away from situations and people that could or would have had devastating results in my life. I have to admit that it took me a while to grow in the knowledge of His love for me…I was going to say that I didn’t have any one to guide me or encourage me or talk me through my feelings and frustrations but I did. Jesus. Man, He’s a good listener!! I was able to keep my eye on Him and pull myself closer to Him…now maybe it did take me a long time to grow into the knowledge of His love and exactly who He is but it’s all a journey in a relationship that will never end. Every day is a new adventure and I love seeing how He brings me to a place that I’m able to see Him in me… I’m glad to say I’m getting there. lol (I’m a perfect example of his patience at work)!
I’m overwhelmed and humbled just how much of my life has been touched by His hand. The God that created everything, every star, every molecule, plant, animal every man and woman, who knows every hair on your head…has kept me in a place that I can live my life with the knowledge that I’m good with Him.
I’m now beginning to really understand all God wants back for all the love He’s given me, which by the way began before I was conceived, is to love Him and believe in what He’s done for me, for us and let others have the opportunity to know Him. He gave up a part of Himself so that I could be called His. It seems so overly simplified… just believe… and I’m right with Him, but it’s true. #What about all my “baggage”?
I mentioned earlier that when I gave my life to Jesus, I went to bed thinking that I’d wake up a totally different human being… heterosexual …wrong!!! That was my lack of understanding at the time of God’s perfect love. It’s not superficial and shallow. He has a plan for me, a plan that will not only change my entire life but more importantly will change others also. I’ve turned away form gay life because of how it would affect my relationship with Him , that was me and my decision when I chose Christ. It’s my form of worship to Him…recently, I was sharing my life with a group of people, now friends, and one of them asked me if I still had gay desires or had they been taken away with my new life in Jesus. Like I just mentioned, I didn’t wake up the next morning after asking God in my life a heterosexual. Those desires which I see now as only temptations are still there. But it’s how you address them that enables you to grow in Christ or fall short of your God- given potential. The key for me is the closer I get to Jesus, the farther those desires are…. once again He’s teaching me that the more I focus on Him the more evident it is of how much He takes care of me. Would I rely on Him as much as I do today if my past would have been completely whipped out….hummm good question. I’ll take the Spiritual change!!! Now I’m seeing God’s love fundamentally renew me from the very core of my being. I was carrying baggage that I couldn’t stop… and the weird thing is I didn’t know it was baggage at the time, until I asked God into my life…There are feelings, desires and habits that are no longer controlling me. I have control now rather than the other way around.
It didn’t happen with a bolt of lighting striking me or blunt force trauma, all those things that kept me from getting closer to Him I can turn my back on because of his incredible presence in my life and the staggering relentless love He shows me. Please don't misunderstand, I’m not bragging on myself, this journey that God’s set me on is a continuing process of love that never gives up. Our perception of love is so limited, it seems that with the love we receive or give variably comes various types of “baggage”. Fear of loosing the person you’ve opened up to, anger of wandering eyes, pride, jealousy the list goes on…. but He wants to show you a perfect love that never gives up. There’s none of that garbage in His love. I’m free from my baggage because I want to be. I know it sounds self righteous but once you experience that kind of love you’ll do anything to keep it close to you… even do the impossible…
#He doesn’t hate us. #He loves us! #That love is yours! He’s knocking at the door.
Answer it… see who’s there and ask Him in.